Buttercream Chevron, YUMMMMM!

As promised, I am going to attempt to walk you through how I do chevron ruffles with buttercream on a cake. 

 

Here are the things you'll need:

Crumb coated layered cake

Chevron cookie cutter

Buttercream icing in your choice of color and flavor

Decorating tip used to make a rose. 

 

After your cake is crumb coated you will use the chevron cookie cutter to gently press into the sides of the cake.  This will leave you with a guide to follow when you add your ruffles. 

This is the tip I used.  It's a Wilton 104.  If you choose one bigger than this it would create a larger ruffle, or vise versa if it were a smaller tip.

 

After you have a guide on the cake you will start by filling in the bottom triangles with a little "pillow" of icing.  This will allow the first full ruffled layer to have a something to lay over.  You will put the wide end of the tip up so that the ruffle has a sharp edge at the bottom.   

Then you will start squeezing and follow up and down each line giving a slight wiggle of your wrist as you move.   

 

 Continue moving up the cake filling in one chevron line at a time.   

 

Switch your tip and put on the next color you are using. 

Follow up and down each line filling in as many sections as you choose. 

As you get closer to the top of the cake you will be left with a small triangle like you had at the bottom of the cake.   

When you fill this section in you will have some icing that goes over the top edge. 

 

Use a small spatula and smooth that icing toward the middle and scrape off the excess icing with each swipe. 

 

 On the top you will squeeze with the wide end pointing to the center of the cake and follow around in a circle.

 Continue with the next color of icing.  If I had been making a one tier cake I would have finished with my darkest shade of pink in the center of the cake.  Because I was going to add another tier I stopped with this color and added wooden skewers to support the top tier.   

 

Here it is with the added tier. 

 

 

 

For the top tier I used a large closed start tip and did roses.

 

 

In a perfect world I would have a nice video of this for you guys to watch!  That's a LOT for me to take in at this point.  Maybe one day I'll get Gonzo to video me and become a computer whiz and upload a superb tutorial.  Until then...I hope this made sense!!!

 

The cake was a hit, but the baby bump was WAY cuter!  We can't wait to meet you Baby Brynley!!!

 

 

If you attempt this tag me in a picture.  I'd love to see it!!!  



Locked out

Yesterday was our first football game of the 2015 season.  I picked Adda up from school and we headed home excited about going to "Daddy's football game!"

I've learned that on game days from 3:10 to kickoff it's balls to the wall with everything there is to do.  Loading bags with snacks and water.  Packing coloring books, crayons, and books.  Getting pjs laid out so that getting ready for bed is quick when we get home.  Eating a good dinner so I don't spend a small fortune at the concession stand.  Getting all our school spirit gear on and fixing lots of hair.  With 4 little ones I have lots of things to take for each one to keep them semi focused in the stands. 

Yesterday when we got home from school I had a few things I needed to finish for a baby shower I'm helping with this weekend and then I was going to get started on my list of things to get us out the door and there for kickoff.  I was doing pretty good until I looked out the front window and saw that my flowers were all about to croak and needed to be watered.  I headed out the front door to water and shortly after Adda and Ella followed right behind me.  As soon as the door closed behind Ella I heard weeping twins.  I asked Ella to go open the door for the twins to come out.  Mom I can't get it open, she said.  So I asked Adda to help Ella open the door.  Mom, it's locked and I can't get it open.  I turned around and said something like "are you freaking kidding me!?!?!?!"

I told you my kids are gonna need counseling.   

I threw the hose and ran to the front door attempting to yank it open, like that was going to help!  I started trying to talk Claire through unlocking the door and she just kept hitting the handle over and over.  Adda and Ella and I were all standing at the door yelling "push it up Claire" and I realized my phone was in my bra! 

That's where I usually store it when I'm in a hurry and my hands are full.

I tried to call Gonzo over and over and he didn't answer.  I tried to call the head football coach and he didn't answer.  I tried to call another coaches wife for her to try and call her husband and she didn't answer.  So, I stood there and thought for a minute about what to do next.  My next thought was to get a neighbor to stand on the porch and watch the twins while I borrowed their car to drive to school and hope that the team had not left for their game yet. 

Then my phone rang and it was Gonzo.  He said, "Hey Babe, what's up!?!?"  I said, I need you to run home because the twins locked us out of the house.  You can imagine what he said next!!  My neighbor walked over while we were waiting for Gonzo and took Adda and Ella back to her house because we were all getting eaten by mosquitos. 

While I stood on the porch hoping I wasn't getting west nile virus from one of the many blood sucking bugs on my legs I snapped a few pictures of the Twinney Twin Twins! 

Trying to talk them through how to unlock the door!

Chloe was thinking, what is she yelling "push it up" for?

Chloe mostly thought this was very funny!

Let me introduce you to Claire!  She enjoys getting into things that a two year old doesn't need to be in.  She also thinks she is more like 10 or so years old.  Claire keeps me very busy!!!

 

I hadn't thought about blogging this because my thoughts were filled with curse words and sweaty pits!  Before my sweet neighbor walked off with Adda and Ella she said, "I hope you are gonna blog about this!"

 

We got to the game before kickoff.  I didn't see the kickoff , but we were there!  That is ALL that matters at this point in my life!  Grateful for a WIN after a craaaaaazy afternoon! 

To The Mom Whose Baby Is Finished With Kindergarten

 

Summer is over and routine begins tomorrow bright and early!!  I've read the blogs about all those babies who are starting Kindergarten this year.  I wondered if I would feel any different this year than I did last year.  Would I still be nervous, and on the verge of tears thinking about walking away from the school on the first day?  NOPE, I'm nervous, I keep getting an anxious feeing in my stomach, and I have randomly felt a few tears welling up in my eyes all day today.  So what about the mom whose kiddo is going into 1st grade?!?!  Or, the mom whose baby is starting Junior High?!?!?!  Oh gosh, that's brutal!!!  Okay, here's one...The mom who left her kid at college!!!  Well, I don't think it does get easier each year.  There are new teachers, and new friends, and new things to learn, and a whole boat load of new things to beg The Lord for!!! 

I think back to the day I found out I was FINALLY pregnant with Adda!  I think about the moment I met eyes with her when she was born.  I think about all those naps we took in a quiet house with her balled up on my chest.  I think about the first time she told me I love you mommy, and the first time she walked to me.  I think about all those special amazing moments and realize that it goes so fast.  A very wise godly lady once told me, "The days are long, but the years are short."  Man, is that true or what!!!

When these "first day" moments come and you realize your baby is one year closer to walking out your door, it's easy to look back at all those little things that make you love your baby so much!  You think about all the things you've done or said that could cause them to need counseling later in life!  Oh boy!  You think back to all those blogs you read about all those supermoms who had a whole summer of learning activities and their kids are reeeeady for the next grade level.  Yeah wow!  Then you think about how you've done the best you could do.  And, somehow your kiddo is doing great! 

As my oldest baby is sleeping I am praying several things!
First, that God would make himself so real to her that she would never turn back.
Second, that she would not remember all the rough mommy moments!!!!
Third, that He would protect her heart in everything she sees, and hears.

So, it's never easy watching your baby get a year older and take another step out of your reach.  And, they really aren't even our babies! So truly all we can do is give them right on over to The Lord.  Oh, gosh that is so hard!  I remember my parents telling me all that time that they daily gave me back to The Lord.  I will be the first to tell you that The Lord did some pretty amazing things to get me to this very couch typing this very blog.  I'm beyond grateful that they gave me back to Jesus every single day!  Ultimately, All my hopes for Adda's life rest in His hands!  My only hope is that she would be sold out to Him. 

To all you mommies who are sending your babies off to the next grade just give them back to Jesus!  He is our only HOPE! 

P.S. I can't wait to see all those first day of school pics tomorrow! 

10 Years!!! That's a BIG deal!

10 years ago Gonzo and I said our vows and became husband and wife.  I really feel like I can remember every single thing from that day.  It was such a good day!  So exciting and I was so happy to finally be with Gonzo.  We were apart for our almost 1 year engagement.  In that time we saw each other 3 times.  So all I wanted to do on the day of our wedding was look at him, and talk to him, and catch up on life, and kiss, and hug, and talk some more.  It was so good to just look at his face.  I know you are all thinking, yeah right Jocelyn, you wanted to do more than that!!!  I really just couldn't get enough of holding hands and looking at his face and hearing his voice.  I'm serious!!! I can't vouch for Gonzo though!!!

So fast forward to now...it's still the same.  I can't get enough of our time when we don't have anything going on around us but what he is telling me and what I am telling him.  Sometimes I daydream about moments when everything stops and we get a moment of just us. 

With 4 little girls in this house who also just want to tell Daddy all about their day, and give the first hug, or get the first kiss, sometimes I feel like I need to push and shove my way through the loudness and get my turn.  Poor guy has to give lots of attention to a bunch of needy ladies!!!

My very favorite times with Gonzo are during football season on Friday nights after a game.  He gets home about 11:30, the girls are in bed, and we talk.  About the game, about the week, about the girls.  He is always a little wound up from the game and we usually talk for a few hours until I don't answer him anymore because I've finally lost the battle with the back of my eyes.  It takes me back to our first year of marriage and staying up late talking and watching football highlights.  Even though the morning comes much earlier now with my 4 alarm clocks than it did back then I still look so forward to Friday nights.

I'm centimental and have a good memory and wanted to think back to some of the major things that happened in each year of our marriage so far. So here it goes!  

Year 1:
We lived in a tiny apartment across from Brookshires Grocery Store in Kaufman, TX.  I taught second grade and Gonzo coached football and taught 8th grade English. Gonzo didn't have a vehicle for most of that year so he rode my bike to the field house every day.  My bike!!!  Not a mans bike.  He rode my red bike I got for maybe my 14th birthday!  I mean really!  Should I just stop here?!?! This guy...not many would have done that!  We only lived there about 9 months and then moved to Arlington for another coaching job.  On our first anniversary we were unloading boxes from the move.  I have a picture of us holding the district championship trophy and I can't find it. One day I'll put it here!  


Year 2:
I was teaching second grade at an elementary school right around the corner from our house.  Gonzo was coaching and teaching at Martin. 

We were starting to really daydream about having a baby and I had been off of birth control for several months.  We bought our first house in Arlington and moved again just 11 months after the last move.

Year 3:
We made our new house a home and were daydreaming even more about little feet running down our halls.  We started to check into the next steps of trying to make a baby after 12 months of nothing.   The outcome of those tests proved that nothing was wrong with either one of us and so we kept doing what we had been doing.  I was still teaching second grade and he was still at Martin. 

 Year 4:
The Lord did some big stuff in us this year and long story short after almost 3 years of trying and waiting and trying and waiting we were pregnant.  There was one night during this year that we will never forget when my folks, Lee and Andrea, and Gonzo and I sat around our living room and cried and prayed and cried and prayed.  Looking back this was a time when The Lord came through BIG for us and we should have turned 180 degrees and we only turned about 90.  We were so grateful for finally being pregnant and knew it was only by God's grace that it happened. He was slowly softening our hearts and wooing us in. 

Year 5:
We had Adda B and she brought us so much joy.  He was still coaching at Martin and I was still teaching.  I took about 13 weeks off after I had Adda and then finished out the school year with her in childcare.  After that I started staying home and kept a few kids for a little extra money. 

Year 6:
I was still watching kids from home so that I could be with Adda.  Gonzo was still coaching at Martin.  Adda was active and our only kiddo and we thought she was the smartest and best little girl there was.  We started to talk about having #2 and thought that since it took so long with Adda we might start trying a little before Adda turned 2.  Boom!  I was pregnant with Ella just like that. I was pregnant in this picture. 

Year 7:
We had another baby!  I was still keeping kids from home and Gonzo was still coaching at Martin.  Things were a tiny bit more hectic and loud and The Lord was showing more and more that I was not in control.  I was realizing slowly but surely that this all together pretty little day to day I had going on was just a covering for what He really wanted to do in my heart.  This actuall picture marks the beginning of something big God was going to do in our life in the next year.  I didn't know it then, but I was pregnant!

Year 8:
Oh Boy!  I can't quickly describe year 8.  This is the year that WE WILL NEVER FORGET!  When everything we knew and loved changed, God was the only constant in our life.  He took a moment in that year and made such greatness come from it.  Some many memories, and friends, and experiences happend in those 8 years and it was all worth it to get to the place the Lord had us.  Year 8 I found out I was pregnant, then I found out I was pregnant with twins, then I found out I was pregnant with twin girls.  These two babies would come to be a symbol of God moving us from a life where we lived a safe Christian life to a time when we relied ONLY on what He was going to do next.

Year 8 was long, and hard, and hard, and hard, and tiresome, but oh my goodness was it so worth every single tear that was shed.  My family might shutter when I say this, but I would go back and do it all again if He asked me to.  Experiencing the unending love that only He can give was so so good!

 In this year Gonzo had a new job as a defensive coordinator at a school in Ft. Worth and I was staying home with our 4 babies. 

Year 9:

Gonzo was still working at Dunbar.  I was still at home with the kids.  Adda was going to preschool 2 days a week and our house was a zoo.  This was another hard, hard, hard year with lots of tears and lots of stretching. Pretty much daily Gonzo and I were reaching out to our home group for prayers and seeing how The Lord changes lives through a Godly community.  At a time when He knew we would need help He provided just what we needed and almost always it was down to the wire.  God likes to stretch us like that. 

Year 10:
Here we are!  So describe what The Lord has done in our lives from year 8 to now is impossible.  I pray that people can see what He has done in us.  I hope that from the outside there is a difference.  We are forever changed all because of year 8.  I cry when I think about how grateful I am for that turning point The Lord allowed.  He get's ALL the glory for everything single thing he has done in our lives.  He has done great things!  All I can do is cry out and praise Him for the GOOD, the BAD, and the UGLY!  Gonzo is still the DC at Ft. Worth Dunbar.  I'm still home with the kiddos.  Adda just finished kindergarten.  Ella went to preschool 2 days a week this year and loved every single second of it.  The twins are almost 2 now and run me into the ground about 30 times a day.  I struggle to keep my head above water almost everyday but we manage.  I struggle with loosing my cool, I have zero patience, my kids pray for my yelling, and a cry often.  The best part is I don't have to carry any of those burdens.  I just give them right on over to my Abba Father and He changes things for my good.  Gonzo and I have learned to love differently now, we have learned to talk differently now, we have learned to pray differently now.  These 10 years have been GOOD!  I'm looking forward to the next "year 8" He brings our way.  We pray often for what He has next for us and wherever He leads us.  He is so good, and so faithful.

It's late!  I'm tired and I need to go to bed!  But listen, if you get nothing at all from this blog hear this!

He is Good

He is Able

He is Love

He is Faithful

He is All Knowing

He is Mighty

He is Forgiving

He is Restoring

He is The Provider

He is Beautiful

He is Safe

He is GOD

If He hasn't left me in my 33 years of life He won't leave you!  When things turn south the only place you can run is right into His arms. In all things and through all things He gets the glory. 10 years ago He knit together two people who He knew would struggle and go through hard times and He never gave up!  

Thank You My Jesus!  May you guide our every step and guard our hearts and bring us closer to you always!  Love you all and hope you are encouraged by these words! 

Oh, I'm not going back to proofread this! Sorry if you see mistakes!  Going to bed now!  

Paused...Until He Takes Us Home!

I'm not the die hard potty training mom who tosses out all diapers and goes cold turkey with nothing but undies.  I keep them in their diaper for nap and bedtime until they start to wake up dry.  With Adda and Ella dry nap time happened pretty quick.  With bedtime it took Adda a good 5 or 6 months to wake up dry and with Ella it only took a few weeks.  So, when I potty train I go in as quick as I can to get them out of the diaper before they wet it, especially in the beginning so they have more success. This is what has worked for me.

Let's start with day 1.  My mom is here visiting and she very graciously agreed to help me do this.  She, by the way is the BEST mom there is because she did her potty training a long time ago with Lee and I.  Very quickly into day 1 I realized that there was no way I could have done it without help.  Potty training two at once is SOOOOO much different than one.  They don't drink at the same time.  They don't pee at the same time.  They don't poo at that same time.  So, you are running back and forth from one bathroom to the other asking one kid the same question 90,000 times a day and trying to remember who just went teetee and who didn't do anything.  All while I have the other two varmints needing me every so often.  Hold cow it's crazy!  By the end of this day we only had 4 accidents total, one dry nap time diaper, and they both went #2 on the potty.  I was amazed actually because day 1 with Adda and Ella was like 9 accidents to1 success.  So for two at one time to do so well seemed like this would be no big deal at all.  By the end of day 1 both of the twins started getting a fever and Chloe had weird hives.  I didn't think much about it because it was a low fever and decided I would just watch them.  So day 1 seemed to be good and my mom and I ended that day with margaritas on the couch after everyone went to bed!

Day 2 went pretty good too in terms of accidents.  Chloe had a little dribble accident first thing in the morning and that was it all day long for both of them.  The only thing that got me worried was that they, especially Claire, only went teetee about 3 times and they were dry for hours at a time.  They both still had this lingering fever and you could tell could feel it.  I was a little nervous that they weren't drinking enough with this fever.  Because it was such a low grade fever I thought for sure they would wake up fever free and ready to go for day 3.  Again, my mom and I ended the day with margaritas on the coach after everyone went to bed...and we watched the Bachelorette and Real Housewives of Orange County.  Smut TV and an adult beverage seemed to be just what we needed to head into day 3.  Haha!  You would have ended that day the same way...trust me! 

Today was day 3 and it started out rough when I rushed in to get them up as soon as I heard the first peep only to smell poop.  Claire had been working on a good one the day before with no success before bed and I knew she would need to right away in the morning.  I got them out of their diapers and gave them their milk and we sat for our first potty break of the day.  Nobody had a drip.  About 10 minutes later Claire gave us a weird look as was standing in a puddle.  At this point all positive thoughts I was having flew out the window.  I'm pretty good at letting the devil blow out my flame within 30 minutes of the day starting.  I started to feel sad, disappointed, discouraged, and felt like a cloud of yuck was hanging over me.  Like I said before, often the enemy slaps me around early in the day.  That's when everyone is needy and wants milk, and breakfast, and blankets, and dressed, and hair done, and toys out, and Nick Jr. turned on, and so on, and so on, and so on!!!  Usually the first person to ask a question in an ungrateful way gets the crazy eye with a touch of screaming!  I'm sorry!  I'm working on all this!  It's a daily hand over to The Lord.

As I felt myself going to this gross place this morning I knew I needed some good ole prayers.  Luckily I have an amazing group of people that I text and tell my ugliness and they beg The Lord on my behalf.  After several responses of encouraging words and prayers I felt encouraged and ready to get back on the potty bandwagon.  Two ladies, that very much love The Lord, and hear from The Lord, and love me dearly responded with encouraging words to not kill myself and pause this potty training if need be.  I honestly was a little defensive at first because by golly we were gonna get this potty training down come hell or high water.  I mean I posted it to freaking facebook...you can't turn back from that!  Everyone knows your business...stupid social media! 😉

The morning moved on and the twins both were accident free all the way through lunch.  They both went potty right before naps and Claire woke up with a dry diaper.  We drank a smoothie and took a walk outside and came in to potty and Chloe had a #2 success on the potty but neither one went teetee  Right after the potty break Claire had an accident.  Both of them had no fever but were now coughing like crazy.  With all the coughing and Claire's accident I started to head right back down that dark road with my stupid thoughts.  Adda was also couching up a small lung and all I could think about was having to stop potty training.  Their fever came back, and I started to really feel like The Lord was pushing me to remember the words I heard from my two friends earlier in the day about stopping if I needed to.  Was this worth everyone loosing their JOY?  Was it worth the twins having to continue feeling a little like crap and go through this at the same time?  Oh, and I didn't mention that Thursday is our anniversary and my mom was planning on watching the girls so we could go to dinner.  There was no way I could leave her by herself if things weren't looking up around here.

We decided to all load up and pick dinner up at Taco Bueno.  The babies stayed dry the whole way there and back and we went straight to the potty when we got home.  Neither one went teetee so we put them in their seats and all started to eat.  I was sitting in my chair running things through my head when Claire let me know that she went teetee in her chair.  So did Chloe!

When The Lord is checking my prideful heart I usually break down and cry and get really real and all the thoughts I think start rolling out of my mouth.  This time was no different.  I started to cry and told my mom that I was afraid to stop for lots of reasons.  I was afraid of looking like a failure, I was afraid that stopping now would make it harder later, I was afraid of doing this again without my mom here.  I realize I don't have to explain myself to anyone, but I want to.  I started thinking about how moms put these ridiculous pressures on themselves and when they can't reach them its devastating at times.  I started to think about this rush I was in and why?  They aren't even 2 yet!  I think because I did Adda and Ella before they were 2 I decided the twins had to be done before 2 as well.  I started to thinking about the moms I know that would give anything to wipe another butt of the baby they no longer have.  I just wanted to stop and hug the babies with a diaper on and tell them how proud I was and how much I loved them. So I told my mom we are stopping!  She let out a gasp of excitement!  I wanted to be real and bring light to this crazy place we as moms put ourselves in.  I loaded myself down with these must reach goals because it all seemed to line up the right way in my eyes and I was going to get all 4 of mine potty trained by the time they were 2.  Gosh my pride is so gross!

In reality this is not the same as Adda or Ella.  Things were going good and this fever threw us off track and The Lord did some good work in my heart today.  I don't count the last 3 days out.  They were good and I'm always up for a good heart change!  The second I told my mom I wanted to stop I felt like 50lbs were lifted from my shoulders.  Don't carry all that crap Jocelyn!  I can't wait to just let them pee in their diaper tomorrow and cuddle them!!!  Adda asked me what we were doing tomorrow and I said sit, and cuddle, and play, and love on each other.  I'm good with that!  We will revisit it all maybe in July.  I'm going to still put them on the potty every once in a while and ask them about poop.  We are going to work on them telling me more when they feel like going to the potty. This works for now!!!

We are fine, this is fine, get a grip Jocelyn.  You don't have to be a prefect mom!  Isn't this what we tell ourselves all the time??!!!

So we are ending day 3 again with a margarita on the couch after everyone has gone to sleep. We are going to get donuts in the morning and enjoy the day hoping the girls start to feel better.

Oh, and change a few diapers too!  

So long, Farewell...

Are you singing yet?  Are you twirling around pretending you're Julie Andrews running through fields of grass and wildflowers in Austria?  Well, I am!  I was a few days ago!  Crap, I'm so fired up about my news I'll be humming this tune for a while!   Might even run through my backyard with my top off!!!  Maybe not the backyard top off part but possibly through my house with no top!  You'll understand as you continue reading.  You might even want to run with no top after reading this!  Wink, wink!!

Let me start out by telling you about a few very exciting marks that I have always soooo looked forward to with each baby.  These are all things that weren't life or death.  These are things that just plain made me flipping happy.

1. Sleeping on my stomach!
I'm not a stomach sleeper.  I like my side.  My right side to be exact.  But, when that option in taken away from you for about 7 months of a pregnancy because of a human growing in your belly, and then for another 12ish months because of huge boobs that are full of liquid gold, you can't help but feel a little pissed about the loss of that flip.  I never really dreamed about this sleeping position with Adda or Ella (I thought very fondly of it though!!!), but with the twins I longed for my face in the pillow.  So when that day came, that my boobs were like cannons, I was like a sack of potatoes only moving to take a breath.  I had already spent the last two months of the pregnancy so big that I had to be moved out of bed and I was ready to do somersaults.

2.  Sleeping without a bra!
Some ladies are different than others.  Some need a bra early in a pregnancy.  I never locked my ladies up until I absolutely had to.  That means that until my milk came in, I let them roam freely!  Once my milk arrived I had to wrap em' up to prevent a spray down every few hours.  I always nursed longer than 12 months, not because I thought I was a supermom, but because I just made lots of milk and I was home and in a good routine and very much enjoyed nursing my girls.  With the twins I did it longer because I was trying to save us from having to purchase a cow to graze in our backyard and supply our family with a constant flow of dairy.  I found a rhythm and stuck with it.  When I did start to think about quitting I knew I had to very slowly take myself off so that I wouldn't get mastitis again.  After having it 5 times I had nothing in me that wanted to try for a sixth.  It literally feels like a good mixture of a really bad flu and a boob job.  I haven't had a boob job but seems like that's what it would be like! 

3.   My body back! 
With Adda I stopped at 18 months.  By that time she was only nursing morning and night and it was obviously a comfort thing.  I had a 4 month break and then found out I was pregnant with Ella.  Ella was 8 months old and I was pregnant again.  This time a total shocker.  I was fully nursing and had not even had a cycle yet and thought for sure we were protected.  Ha ha!!!  I decided I would try and nurse Ella as long as I could as long as the twins were growing like weeds in my belly.  I stopped nursing Ella at 16 months, 3 weeks before I had the twins.  I just couldn't fit her on my belly anymore and she took to milk in a cup very easily, much easier than Adda did.  I nursed and pumped with the twins for the first 3 weeks and then pumped exclusively up until a few weeks ago.  I finally decided it was time to close the book on that very long chapter of my life.

I don't say any of that to get accolades or pats on the back.  I only say it to give you a GOOD picture of how excited I was to say goodbye to The Pump.  

The first night I didn't pump I laid in bed and took these selfies and sent them to some friends and family members.  My caption read, "These are the faces of a very happy lady who for the first time in almost two years is going to bed without getting her nips sucked down a funnel over and over and drained for my little varmints!  I'm finished...unless all of the sudden I become engorged and need some pain relief!  Ahhhhh!"  We jokingly talked about making a slo-mo video of me beating it with a bat.  Something kinda like this! 

We also talked about videoing Gonzo with the pump on.  I really tried to make that happen!  He wasn't so fired up about trying it out.  

In the end I didn't practice my gold swing on my pump.  I didn't tie it to a raft and send it across Lake Arlington.  And, I didn't pretend I was a National Champion in the weight throw heaving it across the sky.  (I should have done the weight throw one...I know a National Champion in this event and could have gotten some good coaching tips from her.)  I actually haven't even gotten rid of it!!  All this talk about how glad I am to say goodbye to this pump and I still have it.  It's zipped up and on a shelf in the twin's closet.  I've learned to never say never to The Lord.  By that I mean...if something happened and somebody needed breast milk for a baby and I was asked to help and The Lord laid it on my heart over and over and over...and over and over and over again I would get that "sucker" back out and pump again.  Although, my fingers are crossed that I'm done!  Never say never!

HUGE. Sack. Of. Marbles!!!

Marbles...I'm sure you're wondering...Where's she going with this????
Twice this has happened.  Twice people driving by have seen this.  Twice I have almost died with this HUGE sack of marbles.  It's happened twice!!!
I'm sure you are still wondering.

Yesterday I made plans with Adda to eat lunch at school.  She had two Book-It pizza coupons to spend for reading extra books.  Gonzo picked up the two personal pizzas for me the night before and all I would need to do is cut up some fruit, put some crackers in a bag, and fill everyone's water bottles and lunch would be ready for all the girls.  Her lunch is at 10:44, which means I have to walk down the driveway at 10:30 to get to the school in the 8 minutes it takes walking, through 3 doors with my double stroller, checked in with the not so friendly and seemingly very judgmental front desk ladies, and sitting at the table with the girls lunch divvied up before Adda's class walks in.

So, let me start at 7:15.  I had just finished Adda's hair and she was eating breakfast.  Ella finished her pop tart and it was her turn to get dressed.  I lifted her shirt and she was covered in hives.  Like all over the place huge swollen hives.  My eyes bugged out and Ella said, "I've got polka dots!"  She was without a doubt having an allergic reaction.  All I could think about was over a year before the 2 weeks of watching her with an allergic reaction to penicillin, and that was horrible.  I immediately went into "oh crap" mode but knew I still had to get everyone dressed and fed and down the driveway by 8:00.  As soon as we got back from taking Adda to school I called the Dr. and got online reading about an inhaler Ella started taking on Wednesday.  At her 3 year visit I talked with our Dr. about some things I was seeing in Ella that seemed to point to asthma...things that I did at around her age before I was actually diagnosed with asthma.  I had no doubt that's what was going on in her little body, a reaction to this inhaler.  Before I knew it the clock said 10:20 and I had not gotten anything ready for lunch.  I washed and cut up some strawberries, dumped some pretzels in a bag, filled everyone's water cups and threw it all in the diaper bag.  I ran to the twins room and grabbed two diapers and started calling them to the living room to change their diapers.  This is a joke because they like to pretend they don't hear me yelling their name for a new diaper.  They like to keep doing whatever they are doing or come look at me and smile and run the other way.  I snatched one up and started to change her diaper and yelled for Ella to potty and get her shoes on.  Got both diapers changed and their shoes on and headed for the back door.  Ella came running with her jacket and had her shoes on the wrong feet.  Got that situated and herded the cats out the door to get the babies in the stroller when the clock said 10:32.  Down the driveway we went with Ella standing on the back of the stroller while I pushed.  We were walking quickly down Green Oaks (a very busy street) and almost to the stoplight when I realized I left the FREAKING PIZZA!!!!  The whole reason Adda wanted us to go eat lunch...THE PIZZA.  We turned around and I started to run back to the house to not just get the two personal pizzas, but I still had to heat the two personal pizzas.  I pushed my load up our very steep driveway and closed the garage door behind us so I could run in and heat pizza without unloading from the stroller.  On any other day when heating a small pizza in the microwave 30-45 seconds would have been perfect...not this day...1 minute and 15 seconds later per pizza they seemed luke warm enough to go.  I ran to the garage yelling for Ella to get on the stroller.  After we waited for the garage door to slowly go half way up I ran down the very steep driveway with (in my estimation...Ella 32 lbs, Twins 40ish lbs, Big Ass Stroller 40 lbs) my load.  As we were going down Ella screamed.  Not just a scream, she screamed the letters S.H.I.T!!!  Three years old screaming SHIT as we fly down the driveway on four small plastic wheels!  I quickly told her not to say that and shook my head in severe disappointment for my lack of control with that word.  Oh my!!!  My kids are warped!!!  It's official!!!

We took a quick left and I ran down Green Oaks (the very busy street), then a quick right at the stop light across Green Oaks (the very busy street), and down the street headed for Adda's school.  As I was running I had a thought...What does this look like from behind?, In my head it looks like a HUGE sack of marbles beating me in the back of the head.  Everyone passing by knew I was not exercising.  Who would throw their 3 years old on the back and run like that?  No, it was very clear I was running because I was late, and my life is freaking nuts, and I can't get my crap together to be somewhere on time.  All I could see was Adda sitting at the end of the lunch table looking for me to bust through the doors with two personal pizzas!  As the HUGE bag of marbles continued to beat me in the back I ran as fast as I could until the hill started to incline and I had to stop and just put my head down and push.  I felt like a mule walking through a blizzard pulling a wagon with a family of 10.  Ella was asking 50 questions and I finally said Ella...Please...Stop...Asking...Me...Questions...I...Need...To...Focus...We...Are...Late...I...Can't...Breath!!!!
I got up the hill, took a left and finished the hill.  Finally we were rolling on flat ground and I was at the front door of the school.  I pushed the button to have the door unlocked.  I heard the click and I pulled my wagon through the doors.  There were doors right there in front of me and I could have gone right through them and would have been right at Adda's lunch table where I could see her waiting.  Instead, for all the children of Ditto and their safety, I had to take another left and pull my stroller through two more doors that are within a few feet of each other.  The first door is at an awkward angle and has all kinds of Hobby Lobby trinkets, a lamp, and a table right as you go through.  I pulled the stroller over the threshold praying the door frame would hold and nobody would loose a knuckle.  I looked up to see the two not very friendly ladies in the front glaring up at me from their computers and the principle having a lovely chuckle with, I'm assuming, another teacher.  I wanted to scream, DID ANYONE ANTICIPATE A HUGE SACK OF MARBLES AND A MOM OF MULTIPLES COMING THROUGH ALL THESE FREAKING DOORS WHEN YOU HIT UP THE 40% OFF SALE TO DECORATE THE OFFICE?!?!?!?!  Just when those words were about to fly out of my mouth the Kindergarten Aids opened the door and pulled the wagon and children through to the table while I waited on my TAG.  Thank The Good Lord for those ladies!!!  They looked so sympathetic as they came in to help me.  I must have looked like dodo!  I got the tag and walked in the last of the doors to sit down and pass out the food to all the children.  They ate, I sat staring at the wall while all my limbs were shaking from the workout with a HUGE sack of marbles. 

And just like that, her lunch was over, her class was leaving, and my ankles were still shaking.  We loaded back up only to walk back through all those f-ing doors.  As we rolled closer to the office I was thinking of what I would say to justify why the hell I am still pushing 20 month olds in the stroller.  So I did...I used the "sandwich method" - positive, negative, positive!!!  I very politely handed the lady my tag and said "Thanks!  Sorry it's always a train wreck when I come in here!  (positive tone)  You know, one day they will be responsible enough to walk and not be in a DOUBLE stroller.  (negative tone)  Y'all have a great day!  (positive tone)"
 
We walked home very slowly and must have lost the marbles along the way because I felt nothing hitting me in the back.  I didn't regret my statements at all to those ladies.

I posted this picture on Instagram yesterday of all the children at the grocery store with me.  This really has only happened 4 times I think.  It's a beating, and makes me crazy, and tired, and pissed, and sad all at the same time.  It never fails that I get several looks from people like, why would I bring them all to the store.  Like I've totally ruined their grocery store experience by venturing out with my whole crew.  After my jog, that was the last thing I wanted to do when Adda got out of school.  There is a chance that I might use an "all meat method" full of a whole lot of negative for the next glare I get!  Just sayin'!!!!



I'm tired!!!
And...It's all still pretty funny!

And...the HUGE sack of marbles is referring to my boooootay!