Coming Home

There was this girl who married this guy who's dream was to coach football.  That girl is me and there is a WHOLE lot more to that story than just this.

I've always loved sports.  I wanted to be the star athlete in every sport growing up.  I kinda day dreamed about it actually!  Just being honest here folks!!!  I tried hard and gave great effort.  Athleticism just didn't pump thick in my veins!  But, that didn't change how I felt about sports.  When I was in sixth grade I was walking around the football field during lunch recess at Taylor Middle School and a thought popped into my mind.  I remember almost stopping in my tracks and saying it out loud.  "You will marry a football coach" was the thought I had.  But it seemed like more than a thought to me.  So much so, that I went to my Granny and Grandad's house after school that day and told them about it.  I asked my Granny if she thought it was God telling me I was going to marry a coach.  She jokingly said in her smart ass Granny voice "I hope not"!!  Granny wasn't fond of the stereotypical coach (who was lazy, wore tight shorts, and only cared about football) from back in her school secretary days.  And that was it!!  We didn't talk about it again for years.

My senior year in high school I was a student trainer for football.  One Friday night before a game I was walking down the track with some equipment to set down on the home side of the field, and I glanced up in the stands at the spot where I knew the head coach's wife always sat.  I stood there for a second and thought about why she sat there and what that must have been like to be the head coach's wife.  I thought about what she must have felt when she heard comments from the crowd about her husband.  And there it was...that "thought" from sixth grade popped back in my mind!  "You will marry a football coach."  The guy I was dating at the time was a football player, but deep down I knew he wasn't the guy I would want to marry.  So the thought passed, and I moved on back to the training room to do my job before the game.

My Sophomore year in college I applied for an open on-campus job in the athletic office (which was in the gym on campus).  On-campus jobs didn't come open often.  Especially in the athletic office.  I interviewed and was asked to go across campus to the football field house and visit with the Head Football Coach.  As I walked across campus my stomach was in knots.  I'll never forget sitting in the office with Coach Keeling talking about football, and New Mexico, and goals in life.  At the end of our conversation he said "Well, Miss New Mexico (there is a story behind that too), welcome to the Field House".  I told him thank you very much for the opportunity, and as he walked me to the front door to leave he said, "You know every single football secretary has ended up marrying one of the football players.  Are you ready for that?" There was that "thought" again!  "You will marry a football coach."  

To this day Jimmie Keeing still calls me Miss New Mexico.  In fact he used to tell high school recruits when they walked in the front door of the field house right in front of my desk that I was Miss New Mexico and wouldn't they want to come play football where Miss New Mexico went to school.  I always just shook my head and kept working.  One time I told him he had to quit telling people that because somebody was going to look it up and think I was telling that lie!

So I began working in the field house and put my very best "kiss my butt" face on when guys walked through acting like big dumb animals.  I dated a few different guys (who played football) but it was short and clear that they weren't who God had in mind.  One of my very best friends was a guy who played defensive tackle named Gonzo.  We sat together in Chapel 2 days a week.  We sat together in the caf at lunch.  He always stayed after practice on Fridays until I got off work, and we chatted in the field house.  Then one day he told me his "true feeling" about me.  I gave him the "we are just such good friends" response not once, or twice, or even three times.  I told him that 4 times over the next year until finally he played hard to get, and I was smitten!  We started dating in September of my junior year, and I knew right away that this was the guy.  Gonzo was who I was going to marry, and his life-long dream was to coach football.  A few months into our dating I took him home to New Mexico and when Granny met him and found out he was going to be a football coach she pinched his arm and said you better not be like all the coaches I ever knew!  I knew what she was thinking!!!

This past summer I happened to be home visiting during the fair and rodeo. My mom and I took the girls to the parade, and as the band and football float float passed by, I started to cry. Cry?!?!  What in the world?!?!  Thank goodness I had my sunglasses on because how do you explain crying when the band walks by and then letting out another boohoo when the football float went by?  I even took a video and sent it to Gonzo. Why? I sent it to him and told him I cried!  Little did I know that in less than a year that very part of the parade that made me cry would be a new chapter of our life. 

And that brings me to now!
11 years into our marriage
4 kids in 4 years
5 different schools
4 moves
And now that girl is married to that guy who is a head football coach in the town she grew up in. Now that girl will sit up at the top of the stands where all the other coaches wives before me have sat. Now I will watch my girls run around with dad at practice and in the field house like the coaches kids I watched when I was a student trainer.

How did this all happen?  I never ever mentioned to Gonzo in our 14 years together that I wanted to go back to Lovington.  Moving back was never in the vision of where I saw our life going.  Not because I didn't like Lovington, but because I had been gone for so long.  It just never seemed like a possibility.  I've been gone for 16 years!!!  Our life was in Texas.  We weren't looking for this at all.  When this job came open, it was the day we were driving home for Christmas break. We put in the application and asked The Lord to slam the door if it wasn't right.  I had countless conversations with God telling Him that if He was moving me back home I was gonna need Him to make it REAL clear. Like write it across the sky clear!  I asked God to leave NO doubt if Lovington was where He was moving us.  From the day that Gonzo applied for the job to the day he got the call that he was their guy, it was about 6 weeks.  That was a long but necessary 6 weeks of praying and fasting and asking over and over for The Lord to slam the door if it wasn't right.  Over and over God told me Gonzo got the job.  I've never felt so near to Him than in that 6 weeks.  In those 6 weeks door after door opened and Gonzo was offered the Head Football Coaching job in Lovington.  I was going home!!!

So on this day, 11 years ago we were married. I had no idea we would be where we are now. The process!  The process He has walked us through to get to this very spot has been so good!  Tough at times but worth every single second of it all!  

A Christmas Tradition!!!

French Breakfast Puffs...for days!!!

Adda's school has the very best PTA I have ever seen!  They love them some teachers!!! And GOOD teacher to love!  I never worked at a school whose parents loved on their teachers like they do at Ditto.  Last week they did a luncheon where they asked parents to bring their favorite traditional Christmas/Holiday food.  Something they make every year.  Like a recipe that has been passed down and you have it for the same occasion at the same time every year.  You were supposed to send a recipe with it so the teachers could pick the recipes they loved and take them home to make themselves.  I WOULD HAVE LOVED THIS AS A TEACHER!!!

Naturally, my first thought was French Breakfast Puffs!  I also thought about the fact that they could be made ahead and frozen and thought the teachers would love that idea too!  BUT, that meant my big recipe that I usually just do one time for our family would have to be done twice.  I would have to make a whole other recipe to put in the freezer for our family too.  That a lot of rolling!  Almost 196 mini muffins to be exact!  It wasn't TOO bad though!  The teachers loved them and our Christmas morning breakfast is already done! Hallelujah!  I sent some for the coaches at Dunbar and am giving some to my neighbor that just had a baby!

So here is the link to the original blog post a few years ago.  French Breakfast Puffs
Make them!  Your family will be eternally grateful for the "labor of love" they enjoy!!!

Merry Christmas from our crew!!

Buttercream Chevron, YUMMMMM!

As promised, I am going to attempt to walk you through how I do chevron ruffles with buttercream on a cake. 

 

Here are the things you'll need:

Crumb coated layered cake

Chevron cookie cutter

Buttercream icing in your choice of color and flavor

Decorating tip used to make a rose. 

 

After your cake is crumb coated you will use the chevron cookie cutter to gently press into the sides of the cake.  This will leave you with a guide to follow when you add your ruffles. 

This is the tip I used.  It's a Wilton 104.  If you choose one bigger than this it would create a larger ruffle, or vise versa if it were a smaller tip.

 

After you have a guide on the cake you will start by filling in the bottom triangles with a little "pillow" of icing.  This will allow the first full ruffled layer to have a something to lay over.  You will put the wide end of the tip up so that the ruffle has a sharp edge at the bottom.   

Then you will start squeezing and follow up and down each line giving a slight wiggle of your wrist as you move.   

 

 Continue moving up the cake filling in one chevron line at a time.   

 

Switch your tip and put on the next color you are using. 

Follow up and down each line filling in as many sections as you choose. 

As you get closer to the top of the cake you will be left with a small triangle like you had at the bottom of the cake.   

When you fill this section in you will have some icing that goes over the top edge. 

 

Use a small spatula and smooth that icing toward the middle and scrape off the excess icing with each swipe. 

 

 On the top you will squeeze with the wide end pointing to the center of the cake and follow around in a circle.

 Continue with the next color of icing.  If I had been making a one tier cake I would have finished with my darkest shade of pink in the center of the cake.  Because I was going to add another tier I stopped with this color and added wooden skewers to support the top tier.   

 

Here it is with the added tier. 

 

 

 

For the top tier I used a large closed start tip and did roses.

 

 

In a perfect world I would have a nice video of this for you guys to watch!  That's a LOT for me to take in at this point.  Maybe one day I'll get Gonzo to video me and become a computer whiz and upload a superb tutorial.  Until then...I hope this made sense!!!

 

The cake was a hit, but the baby bump was WAY cuter!  We can't wait to meet you Baby Brynley!!!

 

 

If you attempt this tag me in a picture.  I'd love to see it!!!  



Locked out

Yesterday was our first football game of the 2015 season.  I picked Adda up from school and we headed home excited about going to "Daddy's football game!"

I've learned that on game days from 3:10 to kickoff it's balls to the wall with everything there is to do.  Loading bags with snacks and water.  Packing coloring books, crayons, and books.  Getting pjs laid out so that getting ready for bed is quick when we get home.  Eating a good dinner so I don't spend a small fortune at the concession stand.  Getting all our school spirit gear on and fixing lots of hair.  With 4 little ones I have lots of things to take for each one to keep them semi focused in the stands. 

Yesterday when we got home from school I had a few things I needed to finish for a baby shower I'm helping with this weekend and then I was going to get started on my list of things to get us out the door and there for kickoff.  I was doing pretty good until I looked out the front window and saw that my flowers were all about to croak and needed to be watered.  I headed out the front door to water and shortly after Adda and Ella followed right behind me.  As soon as the door closed behind Ella I heard weeping twins.  I asked Ella to go open the door for the twins to come out.  Mom I can't get it open, she said.  So I asked Adda to help Ella open the door.  Mom, it's locked and I can't get it open.  I turned around and said something like "are you freaking kidding me!?!?!?!"

I told you my kids are gonna need counseling.   

I threw the hose and ran to the front door attempting to yank it open, like that was going to help!  I started trying to talk Claire through unlocking the door and she just kept hitting the handle over and over.  Adda and Ella and I were all standing at the door yelling "push it up Claire" and I realized my phone was in my bra! 

That's where I usually store it when I'm in a hurry and my hands are full.

I tried to call Gonzo over and over and he didn't answer.  I tried to call the head football coach and he didn't answer.  I tried to call another coaches wife for her to try and call her husband and she didn't answer.  So, I stood there and thought for a minute about what to do next.  My next thought was to get a neighbor to stand on the porch and watch the twins while I borrowed their car to drive to school and hope that the team had not left for their game yet. 

Then my phone rang and it was Gonzo.  He said, "Hey Babe, what's up!?!?"  I said, I need you to run home because the twins locked us out of the house.  You can imagine what he said next!!  My neighbor walked over while we were waiting for Gonzo and took Adda and Ella back to her house because we were all getting eaten by mosquitos. 

While I stood on the porch hoping I wasn't getting west nile virus from one of the many blood sucking bugs on my legs I snapped a few pictures of the Twinney Twin Twins! 

Trying to talk them through how to unlock the door!

Chloe was thinking, what is she yelling "push it up" for?

Chloe mostly thought this was very funny!

Let me introduce you to Claire!  She enjoys getting into things that a two year old doesn't need to be in.  She also thinks she is more like 10 or so years old.  Claire keeps me very busy!!!

 

I hadn't thought about blogging this because my thoughts were filled with curse words and sweaty pits!  Before my sweet neighbor walked off with Adda and Ella she said, "I hope you are gonna blog about this!"

 

We got to the game before kickoff.  I didn't see the kickoff , but we were there!  That is ALL that matters at this point in my life!  Grateful for a WIN after a craaaaaazy afternoon! 

To The Mom Whose Baby Is Finished With Kindergarten

 

Summer is over and routine begins tomorrow bright and early!!  I've read the blogs about all those babies who are starting Kindergarten this year.  I wondered if I would feel any different this year than I did last year.  Would I still be nervous, and on the verge of tears thinking about walking away from the school on the first day?  NOPE, I'm nervous, I keep getting an anxious feeing in my stomach, and I have randomly felt a few tears welling up in my eyes all day today.  So what about the mom whose kiddo is going into 1st grade?!?!  Or, the mom whose baby is starting Junior High?!?!?!  Oh gosh, that's brutal!!!  Okay, here's one...The mom who left her kid at college!!!  Well, I don't think it does get easier each year.  There are new teachers, and new friends, and new things to learn, and a whole boat load of new things to beg The Lord for!!! 

I think back to the day I found out I was FINALLY pregnant with Adda!  I think about the moment I met eyes with her when she was born.  I think about all those naps we took in a quiet house with her balled up on my chest.  I think about the first time she told me I love you mommy, and the first time she walked to me.  I think about all those special amazing moments and realize that it goes so fast.  A very wise godly lady once told me, "The days are long, but the years are short."  Man, is that true or what!!!

When these "first day" moments come and you realize your baby is one year closer to walking out your door, it's easy to look back at all those little things that make you love your baby so much!  You think about all the things you've done or said that could cause them to need counseling later in life!  Oh boy!  You think back to all those blogs you read about all those supermoms who had a whole summer of learning activities and their kids are reeeeady for the next grade level.  Yeah wow!  Then you think about how you've done the best you could do.  And, somehow your kiddo is doing great! 

As my oldest baby is sleeping I am praying several things!
First, that God would make himself so real to her that she would never turn back.
Second, that she would not remember all the rough mommy moments!!!!
Third, that He would protect her heart in everything she sees, and hears.

So, it's never easy watching your baby get a year older and take another step out of your reach.  And, they really aren't even our babies! So truly all we can do is give them right on over to The Lord.  Oh, gosh that is so hard!  I remember my parents telling me all that time that they daily gave me back to The Lord.  I will be the first to tell you that The Lord did some pretty amazing things to get me to this very couch typing this very blog.  I'm beyond grateful that they gave me back to Jesus every single day!  Ultimately, All my hopes for Adda's life rest in His hands!  My only hope is that she would be sold out to Him. 

To all you mommies who are sending your babies off to the next grade just give them back to Jesus!  He is our only HOPE! 

P.S. I can't wait to see all those first day of school pics tomorrow! 

10 Years!!! That's a BIG deal!

10 years ago Gonzo and I said our vows and became husband and wife.  I really feel like I can remember every single thing from that day.  It was such a good day!  So exciting and I was so happy to finally be with Gonzo.  We were apart for our almost 1 year engagement.  In that time we saw each other 3 times.  So all I wanted to do on the day of our wedding was look at him, and talk to him, and catch up on life, and kiss, and hug, and talk some more.  It was so good to just look at his face.  I know you are all thinking, yeah right Jocelyn, you wanted to do more than that!!!  I really just couldn't get enough of holding hands and looking at his face and hearing his voice.  I'm serious!!! I can't vouch for Gonzo though!!!

So fast forward to now...it's still the same.  I can't get enough of our time when we don't have anything going on around us but what he is telling me and what I am telling him.  Sometimes I daydream about moments when everything stops and we get a moment of just us. 

With 4 little girls in this house who also just want to tell Daddy all about their day, and give the first hug, or get the first kiss, sometimes I feel like I need to push and shove my way through the loudness and get my turn.  Poor guy has to give lots of attention to a bunch of needy ladies!!!

My very favorite times with Gonzo are during football season on Friday nights after a game.  He gets home about 11:30, the girls are in bed, and we talk.  About the game, about the week, about the girls.  He is always a little wound up from the game and we usually talk for a few hours until I don't answer him anymore because I've finally lost the battle with the back of my eyes.  It takes me back to our first year of marriage and staying up late talking and watching football highlights.  Even though the morning comes much earlier now with my 4 alarm clocks than it did back then I still look so forward to Friday nights.

I'm centimental and have a good memory and wanted to think back to some of the major things that happened in each year of our marriage so far. So here it goes!  

Year 1:
We lived in a tiny apartment across from Brookshires Grocery Store in Kaufman, TX.  I taught second grade and Gonzo coached football and taught 8th grade English. Gonzo didn't have a vehicle for most of that year so he rode my bike to the field house every day.  My bike!!!  Not a mans bike.  He rode my red bike I got for maybe my 14th birthday!  I mean really!  Should I just stop here?!?! This guy...not many would have done that!  We only lived there about 9 months and then moved to Arlington for another coaching job.  On our first anniversary we were unloading boxes from the move.  I have a picture of us holding the district championship trophy and I can't find it. One day I'll put it here!  


Year 2:
I was teaching second grade at an elementary school right around the corner from our house.  Gonzo was coaching and teaching at Martin. 

We were starting to really daydream about having a baby and I had been off of birth control for several months.  We bought our first house in Arlington and moved again just 11 months after the last move.

Year 3:
We made our new house a home and were daydreaming even more about little feet running down our halls.  We started to check into the next steps of trying to make a baby after 12 months of nothing.   The outcome of those tests proved that nothing was wrong with either one of us and so we kept doing what we had been doing.  I was still teaching second grade and he was still at Martin. 

 Year 4:
The Lord did some big stuff in us this year and long story short after almost 3 years of trying and waiting and trying and waiting we were pregnant.  There was one night during this year that we will never forget when my folks, Lee and Andrea, and Gonzo and I sat around our living room and cried and prayed and cried and prayed.  Looking back this was a time when The Lord came through BIG for us and we should have turned 180 degrees and we only turned about 90.  We were so grateful for finally being pregnant and knew it was only by God's grace that it happened. He was slowly softening our hearts and wooing us in. 

Year 5:
We had Adda B and she brought us so much joy.  He was still coaching at Martin and I was still teaching.  I took about 13 weeks off after I had Adda and then finished out the school year with her in childcare.  After that I started staying home and kept a few kids for a little extra money. 

Year 6:
I was still watching kids from home so that I could be with Adda.  Gonzo was still coaching at Martin.  Adda was active and our only kiddo and we thought she was the smartest and best little girl there was.  We started to talk about having #2 and thought that since it took so long with Adda we might start trying a little before Adda turned 2.  Boom!  I was pregnant with Ella just like that. I was pregnant in this picture. 

Year 7:
We had another baby!  I was still keeping kids from home and Gonzo was still coaching at Martin.  Things were a tiny bit more hectic and loud and The Lord was showing more and more that I was not in control.  I was realizing slowly but surely that this all together pretty little day to day I had going on was just a covering for what He really wanted to do in my heart.  This actuall picture marks the beginning of something big God was going to do in our life in the next year.  I didn't know it then, but I was pregnant!

Year 8:
Oh Boy!  I can't quickly describe year 8.  This is the year that WE WILL NEVER FORGET!  When everything we knew and loved changed, God was the only constant in our life.  He took a moment in that year and made such greatness come from it.  Some many memories, and friends, and experiences happend in those 8 years and it was all worth it to get to the place the Lord had us.  Year 8 I found out I was pregnant, then I found out I was pregnant with twins, then I found out I was pregnant with twin girls.  These two babies would come to be a symbol of God moving us from a life where we lived a safe Christian life to a time when we relied ONLY on what He was going to do next.

Year 8 was long, and hard, and hard, and hard, and tiresome, but oh my goodness was it so worth every single tear that was shed.  My family might shutter when I say this, but I would go back and do it all again if He asked me to.  Experiencing the unending love that only He can give was so so good!

 In this year Gonzo had a new job as a defensive coordinator at a school in Ft. Worth and I was staying home with our 4 babies. 

Year 9:

Gonzo was still working at Dunbar.  I was still at home with the kids.  Adda was going to preschool 2 days a week and our house was a zoo.  This was another hard, hard, hard year with lots of tears and lots of stretching. Pretty much daily Gonzo and I were reaching out to our home group for prayers and seeing how The Lord changes lives through a Godly community.  At a time when He knew we would need help He provided just what we needed and almost always it was down to the wire.  God likes to stretch us like that. 

Year 10:
Here we are!  So describe what The Lord has done in our lives from year 8 to now is impossible.  I pray that people can see what He has done in us.  I hope that from the outside there is a difference.  We are forever changed all because of year 8.  I cry when I think about how grateful I am for that turning point The Lord allowed.  He get's ALL the glory for everything single thing he has done in our lives.  He has done great things!  All I can do is cry out and praise Him for the GOOD, the BAD, and the UGLY!  Gonzo is still the DC at Ft. Worth Dunbar.  I'm still home with the kiddos.  Adda just finished kindergarten.  Ella went to preschool 2 days a week this year and loved every single second of it.  The twins are almost 2 now and run me into the ground about 30 times a day.  I struggle to keep my head above water almost everyday but we manage.  I struggle with loosing my cool, I have zero patience, my kids pray for my yelling, and a cry often.  The best part is I don't have to carry any of those burdens.  I just give them right on over to my Abba Father and He changes things for my good.  Gonzo and I have learned to love differently now, we have learned to talk differently now, we have learned to pray differently now.  These 10 years have been GOOD!  I'm looking forward to the next "year 8" He brings our way.  We pray often for what He has next for us and wherever He leads us.  He is so good, and so faithful.

It's late!  I'm tired and I need to go to bed!  But listen, if you get nothing at all from this blog hear this!

He is Good

He is Able

He is Love

He is Faithful

He is All Knowing

He is Mighty

He is Forgiving

He is Restoring

He is The Provider

He is Beautiful

He is Safe

He is GOD

If He hasn't left me in my 33 years of life He won't leave you!  When things turn south the only place you can run is right into His arms. In all things and through all things He gets the glory. 10 years ago He knit together two people who He knew would struggle and go through hard times and He never gave up!  

Thank You My Jesus!  May you guide our every step and guard our hearts and bring us closer to you always!  Love you all and hope you are encouraged by these words! 

Oh, I'm not going back to proofread this! Sorry if you see mistakes!  Going to bed now!